Painful Love

I used  to imagine many beautiful things when heard about “love”. Two persons, a man and his woman, decided to share life and grow old together because of “love”. They even promised to live faithfully for one-another in all circumstances: joyful and sorrowful, bright and gloomy, highs and lows, or sweet and bitter days together… forever…

In reality, love is not merely about happiness. We can’t expect joy would come along all our ways just because we are in love. People who are in love must face many difficulties, struggles, or even pains that challenge their “love”. There is no “painless love”. When you are falling in love, you are declaring yourself to be ready for pain, because there is always pain in every “falling”. That’s why it is called “falling in love”.

You know what? Love is patient. Patient, in a medical world, also refers to sick people. So, can I say that people who are in “love” are actually people who are “sick” also? Love suffers long. Would you agree if I say that the most romantic expression of love is sacrifice? When your giving is truly out of love, it should be from your sacrifice: either sacrificing your money, energy, time, or any precious things worthy to you. It is too shameful to give your “coins” to people who truly matters to you.

I like to think about the sacrifice of a mother delivering her baby when talking about “love”. We are all born out of mother’s sacrifice. We are all born out of love. To love is to sacrifice, and every sacrifice is painful. But… be careful that the “sacrifice” here is your self-sacrifice, it does not mean “sacrificing others”. The world we live in now is getting crazier where the “lover” are not even afraid anymore to sacrifice the one they “love” when they feel rejected, in the name of “love”. Such evil thing is not love, it is lust. To lust is to sacrifice others for your own benefit, but to love is to sacrifice yourself for others’ benefit. Lust is all about yourself, but love is not about you.

Knowing that love is so painful, many people are now afraid to love, even afraid of being loved. Don’t lose heart! Not every pleasure is good and not every pain is bad. Love is one of the good pains because it will help you grow up and reach the highest level of maturity. A true love will come to your life in the perfect time as soon as you are ready!

Happy Valentine’s day

Written by a man who has not yet been in love with a woman, but has experienced a divine love from his Creator

Seoul, February, 14, 2014

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